Exercise 101

This one is for the girls:

UGHHHHH. What is all this FLAB?! OH GOSH those thunder thighs!! Time to start hitting that gym, girl! But the gym takes a lot of work. Here’s how to survive:

Step 1: Get an incentive

This is a tough one. First, you got to have a reason to go every day. Or every other day. Or AT LEAST once a week…. Unless it’s finals or midterms, then you just don’t have time, do you?!
GIRL, DO I HAVE TO SLAP YOU ALREADY? Stop thinking like that.

Option 1: Gym buddy! This is the best option. Thus, it’s number one position. But you must make sure that this buddy is at the same commitment level as you. It doesn’t work if she could easily go or not go to the gym. She has to want to go as much as you do. It doesn’t work if she wants to work out for 5 hours, while you’re intensity level is like, 30 minutes every day.

Option 2: Make an AWESOME KICK ASS WORKOUT PLAYLIST on your iPod. And name it “AWESOME KICK ASS WORKOUT PLAYLIST” and fill it with energy pumping songs. NOTHING slow/mellow. Think mixes have to have highs and lows? NOPE. Just keep escalating the intensity of the songs. Trust me. That’s what makes it awesome.

Option 3: Make a chart. If you’re a practical type of gal, do an excel schedule. Make a list. Whatever you gotta do to keep track of your progress to keep you motivated.

Option 4: Find a cute guy at the gym. Be it a worker, or that guy that lifting weights, and time your workouts with them.

Option 5: Obviously, just do all 4 options, and you’ll be good to go.


Step 2: Look cute

No one REALLY looks amazing at the gym, but there’s no reason you can’t try to look as hot as you can.

First, pick a good outfit. Girls always go in oversized T-shirts that they got for free from some event, but I don’t know why when Target sells perfectly good fitted sports tops. Get some short shorts and a colorful sports bra. If it’s the summer, and you’re already pretty fit, just go for it and wear that sports bra with nothing else on top. Other girls will hate you, but who cares?

Second, do your hair. Obviously it’s going to be up, but definitely make it a high pony tail. It’s perky and looks like you put more effort into it, even though it really doesn’t take that much more effort at all. If you have bangs, don’t leave it hanging. It’s just going to get annoying, and does not look good when you’re sweating. Bobby pin it up. Don’t do a messy bun unless you want to look like you just rolled out of bed. You might as well just wear a T-shirt, too, you bum. Come on, try a little!

Third, put on some make up. Ok, people are going to be like, WHY are you going to the gym with make up on? And honestly, if they can tell you’ve put on makeup, that is too much! But contrary to what they say, a little makeup is totally ok, even necessary. Don’t bother with foundation or anything. You’re just going to sweat it off. Don’t bother with blush, you’ll get naturally flushed cheeks, duh. Eyeliner looks like you tried too much. Just put on mascara and lip gloss. Effortless beauty. You’re a natural. ;) Oh, and don’t forget your stud earrings. It’s the little things that make the difference!

Once you get to the gym, stretch. I personally think stretching is the most fun, but it’s also good for you. Flexibility= good (in bed!). This is pretty much the time when you can look the hottest, so take advantage and do it before and after every workout. Practice in front of a mirror beforehand to make sure you have the most flattering positions down.

Finally, pick a good machine. The bike really doesn’t show off your body at all. Go on the elliptical, or treadmill. If you want to lift weights, use the dumb bells. Try to work out in front of a mirror if possible so you can make sure you’re looking good. I mean, using the machine correctly.


Step 3: Show it off

Go out in a short skirt and tank top. Don’t worry about the scale, or how your jeans fit. Stand up straight and smile. You look so damn hot now.