Dating 101 (Part 1)

This one is for the guys:

Like a girl but not sure what to do? Here’s a sure fire way to find out whether she’s too hot for you or not!

Step 1: Make Contact

So there’s this girl, right? Yeah, she’s pretty cute. She’s making eye contact, laughing at your stupid jokes… score! Since this is the beginning, so you don’t want to fuck up. But don’t worry if you mess up a little, she doesn’t know you well enough to care yet. You still have time to make an impression, but for a good head start, you’re going to want to do this right!

If you want, you can go straight for the number. To do this, you must be fairly certain she’s interested. Sometimes it’s nice when a guy just asks, with no fake pretenses—just a simple, “Let’s go out, what’s your number?” (OK, maybe something a little more eloquent than that). But sometimes, it comes on a bit strong and girls like to be wooed. So at the very least get her screen name. At the VERY least, get her last name. So you can facebook (stalk) her.


Step 2: Chat it up

Let’s assume you do the facebook thing. Click “Add as friend” and you’re in! Look at her info and do a little background research. Hey, she likes that band too? Awesome. File that info away—don’t ever let it slip that you actually read her info, but now you have some fodder to cleverly sneak into a conversation. “Yeah, I was listening to the new ______ album last night. ….NO WAY! You like them too? My favorite song is ______” etc.

If she turned on her facebook chat, you got it easy peasy, my friend. Start a casual conversation (not gonna make it THAT easy and give you all the details!) and eventually get her AIM… because facebook chat sucks. If she’s not online, just leave a post on her wall. Make it short and simple, with an opening for her to say something back. “Hey it was nice meeting you!” is nice, but try to add something about the conversation you had, or make a joke, or ask a question, so she has more to say then “It was nice meeting you too! [You boring motherf—er] :)”


Step 3: Be there

So you met this girl in class. Or through a club. Or through a friend. Or on the bus. You’re facebook friends now, so you can start to be acquaintances in life. And you’re going to want to establish this face time if you can. If you can see her, do it. If you can’t, that’s why there’s instant messaging.

Now, this instant messaging business is not my cup of tea, but hey, that’s how people roll nowadays so I guess you can go this route. So be friendly in person, and even friendlier online. Hey, calm down, not TOO friendly, but just friendly enough. If you’re confident enough in your taste, send a few funny links. Entertain her, as if to say, “Hey I’m a fun guy! I’d be a fun date!”

Establish some rapport, and then let her know you’re interested in actually getting to know her. Ask her questions that make her think (not in a bookish way, but in an interesting and entertaining kind of way so you get an idea of what she likes to do, what she values, how she feels about certain things), and if you’re clever, questions that make her laugh. She will not laugh over sexually suggestive jokes. Do not attempt.

...TO BE CONTINUED (Tomorrow: taking the plunge, recovery, and moving on!)